Elliott's Eccentricities- The Rake's Song by The Decemberists

A song has to be truly incredibly for one to love it despite completely hating what it says in its lyrics. Rap is usually a good example of this for me, with rappers commonly using absolutely brilliant lines to effectively act like a peacock, strutting about with all of its feathers out, showing how amazing they are. A famous line around the Frog on a Log office is Lil Wayne’s line in 3 Peat, “Shit, get on my level, you can’t get on my level. You will need a space shuttle or a ladder that’s forever” ( I argue that a ladder is the lesser option, what happens if you fall off?). This lyric is nothing more than petty showboating, yet the image it provides is just brilliant. Yet despite the prevalence of the awesome-song-terrible-message effect in rap, it is not unknown to other genres. To that effect I present The Rake’s Song from The Decemberist’s The Hazards of Love.

Before I get into The Rake’s Song, I think that it is necessary to give a short description of The Hazards of Love to provide some context. The Hazards of Love is a wonderful concept album (I am a HUGE sucker for concept albums) that tells tragic love story of a girl Margaret and William, the adopted son of a fairy queen. Long story short, they meet, fall for each other, get it on, and get insta-pregnant. William’s mom finds out and isn’t happy so William decides to run away with his love, only to find that she has been kidnapped by a rake named “The Rake” (a rake is a dissolute person, look it up). Anywho, William chases after her, saves her, and then (spoilers) everyone dies (except the queen).

On the eccentricity scale ranging from 1 to 10
1- I believe in ghosts
10- I believe I am a ghost ( haven’t you seen the sixth sense?!?!)
The Rake’s Song-2/10

The first half of the album serves as the setup for the action that is to take place in the second act. Everything is all hunky dory until after the interlude when The Rake’s Song explodes onto the scene. The song signals that the villain has arrived and that shit is about to go down.  The Rake is the most despicable person I have ever heard of which is saying a lot seeing as I know Steve personally. Not only is he a complete womanizer/rapist and murdered his children, but he appears to be proud of it! Take a look at the picture from the album art below, nothing says “I am evil” like the look on his face, the pose he is striking, his terrifying bushy eyebrows and comb-over, and the FREAKING RATS used to frame him. He is made out to be Hitler’s best man. Yet The Rake’s Song makes me fall completely in love with him.

Is it just me or does he sport a uni-brow? 

The song completely rocks out; the amazing combination of repetitive chords, booming baseline, and kick-ass drums are amazing to listen to with the speakers turned up to 11. John and I both agree that the “all-right”s in the song are the third greatest “all-right”s in music history ( Revolution by the Beatles and Hey Ya by Outcast taking spots number one and two respectively).  I just can’t help belting out the lyrics.

But the lyrics are awful! They are incredibly chauvinistic, violent, and despicable. Yet despite the terrible things they say, the way that they are said is quite beautiful. The line “Until her womb started spilling out babies, Only then did I reckon my curse” is expressed in the most wonderful way, the word choice excellently establishes the rake’s attitude. Why say “I started to kill my children” when you could say “So my burden I began to divest”? The lyrics are elegant poetry that describes a truly horrific person; the contrast between the two just strengthens the power of both.

I love this song because it makes the rake one of the most powerful characters in the album despite his minimal presence (he only sings in 2 of the seventeen songs, and barely mentioned in 3 others). He is larger than life; I absolutely love to hate him. So whenever I listen to The Rake’s Song I find myself singing along, simultaneously praising him and hating him. I just hope that there aren’t any girls or people who love children around whenever I do.